Garza Funeral Home Obituaries Brownsville, Texas, Articles M

Then get out of town. I'm fed up with all this reading! The first car your brilliant father sold cost $320. A little less flat, a lot more heel. Yes! DOCTOR What? I broke your arm once before; I can do it again, Jenny. 1. It's your fault. And remember to be eXtremely careful. The Invisible Man . They are all dressed in costume: Eric as Batman, Tommy as the Incredible Hulk, Lavender as a Princess, Nigel as Spiderman, Bruce in army gear, Amanda as Superwoman, Alice as Wonder Woman, Hortensia as a queen. MR WORMWOODOh, this is thick! Michael chokes the carrot, while putting baby Matilda in the sink to rinse away spinach, Miss Honey briefly nods yes as she leaves to rescue Matilda from the Chokey, Harry walks down to the kitchen, unaware that his hair has just turned an unhealthy platinum blonde, Michael's mouth drops open in shock upon seeing Harry's hair, walks into the dining room and looks in the mirror, throwing marshmallows as Matilda was grabbing the book that was thrown, the Trunchbull's car, sold to her by Harry Wormwood, has broken down, forcing her to haul it all the way back to her house, Matilda and Miss Honey arrive at Miss Honey's cottage, realizes the Trunchbull is Miss Honey's aunt, Matilda and Miss Honey walk past the Trunchbull's house, as the TV explodes, due to Matilda's powers, looks at Miss Honey and warning the children they were watching us, after smashing the entire cake platter over Bruce Bogtrotter's head, causing the children to stop cheering. I can pretend I'm an . Forgotten, by everyone except, that is [She pulls her coat over her head.] All escapes start with the click of a lock. Then suddenly, the audience jumped to its feet and roared in appreciation! MISS TRUNCHBULL grabs AMANDA by the pigtails and swings her around and around. 1. But not just to see their skill, but also to see their love for each other, which was so deep that it was said that cats would purr as they passed them, and dogs would weep with joy. . The guy with the stupid haircut! You are a teacher. MR WORMWOODOh, my good Lord. One should avoid confrontation when possible. Someone poured a whole can of syrup onto Trunchbull's chair. Five times two is ten. I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away. But Harry's ranting and raving gave Matilda the key to her power. Stand out from the crowd! Hat seems to be, er . Mr. Wormwood: MISS TRUNCHBULL strides to the board. The couples and the children overlap the next two verses, as children split themselves among five couples and execute rote choreography. The world's greatest acrobat! If I give the crowd their money back, where is my profit?! And I've told her all about you and your smarty-pants ideas. Yes, sir. Just knock on the door. When all had quietened down, she stepped forward and produced . Oh, Matilda, this is very sad! Oh yeah, huh, well, uh Agatha Trunchbull: Four times two is eight. MISS HONEY Harry Wormwood: Let out your belt. It was the biggest burp I had ever heard, the biggest burp I had ever heard about. It's called "Moby Dick", by Herman Melville. That's the bananas right there. Jul 25, - Barney Stinson's Harry Potter pick up lines. This still, unbroken skin, MATILDA Mrs. Wormwood: Michael, pencil and paper, in the kitchen. . MICHAEL sits on his lap. It's out of the question. Hanging down by your ears. The kind with food and teeny-weeny cockroaches. She misses me so much. But this little girl . It's Miss Honey. Good-bye, Miss Honey. Apply just one simple rule Ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely. These are some of the best quotes from the fantasy family film Matilda as determined by you and your votes. It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. If you want to throw the hammer for your country. I think they do it deliberately, just to annoy me. Miss Honey taught us how to spell a long word yesterday. Tricks!" You gotta give yourself permission to shine. You make money? //-->. If you were a vegetable, you'd be a 'cute-cumber.'. . Hey, Dip face. front bottom. DOCTOR But I've got a baby! A little less head, a lot more derriere. NIGEL MRS PHELPS What is your name? You slithered like a serpent into the school kitchen and ate MY PERSONAL SNACK! Agatha Trunchbull: . How dare they speak to me like that! Stop me when this becomes true, but once upon a time, you and I went on a date. RUDOLPHO whips off MRS WORMWOOD's skirt to reveal a shorter skirt made of tassels beneath it. Million $ Sticky Host: Not dressed in hospital cotton, That's right, honey, look at mummy. Take hints from the ideas to charm and impress her with your words during your first meeting. MISS TRUNCHBULL runs in, blowing on her whistle, and chases ERIC down until he is pulled into formation by two BIG KIDS. 10. You have to stay inside the circle all the time. Two other dancing teams come in and join MRS WORMWOOD and RUDOLPHO in the competition. MRS WORMWOOD MISS TRUNCHBULL Zinnia's on the phone, talking about her kids] Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it. You might as well be saying you think that it's okay, [bends down] Agatha Trunchbull: See you next week. I can feel it in my hips. What can I do? And do you tell them lots of stories like you do with me? MATILDA opens a cupboard at the front of the stage. Crazy Credits Then your mummy is a twit! . My mummy says I'm a lousy little worm. Well, I shall take your money when you earn it, and I shall spend it. Just because you find that life's not fair, it Agatha Trunchbull: MISS HONEY, BIG KIDS, and CHILDREN That kids like me should be against the law. Her mind is incredible. Ciao, Rudolpho. I have suffered in this jail. No one's gonna tell you when to wiggle your bumba. I don't want another one. [on the phone, yells] Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you. That I'm as tiny and as shiny as a . Mr Wormwood! Harry Wormwood: It's not trash, Daddy, it's lovely. MR WORMWOOD exits while MATILDA runs into her bedroom, flings the door open, and climbs onto her bookshelf. I am GUILTYwhen the Headmistress says I am GUILTY.". I mean, I know you say you didn't, but obviously, you did. The curtain is wheeled away to reveal MRS WORMWOOD. It must be wonderful for a child to be so wanted. Trunchbull: CHILDREN No. The scene changes to the library. A little less shh, a lot more schwing. That I'm as tiny and as shiny as a mirror ball. Go on. MAN: Take another picture of our angel from this angle over here. The ACROBAT enters from the back of the stage, and the ESCAPOLOGIST takes her by the hand. BIG KID [BEN] CHILDREN 1 Wonderful. [into recorder] The subsequent fall was inevitable. She uses them to carry on a conversation. MISS HONEY A baby, Mrs Wormwood. Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it. At night, they listened to the silence of their big, empty house, and they would imagine how beautiful it would be if it was filled with the sound of a child playing. Get on with it. What was my profit for the day? Because you're pretty darn sweet. What you know matters less [suspicious] RUDOLPHO I've got a plane to catch at three. The sooner you're locked up in that school, the better. [He pulls the towel over his head and starts massaging vigorously]. BIG KID [BEN] Agatha Trunchbull: . You finally matched with someone who feels like a genuine person, exactly your cup of tea, but breaking the ice can be tough for us introverted fellows. We must find out how it ends. Filthy, nasty things. They say it's a cupboard in her office that she throws children into. "Bambinatum est magitum." I don't know. RUDOLPHO starts dancing with and carrying around MISS HONEY, which he continues to do throughout the song. Well, here I am. One of the novel's antagonists, Mr. Wormwood is Matilda and Michael 's father, and Mrs. Wormwood 's husband. MR WORMWOOD unwraps the blanket that the baby is swathed in. And that's not a hint, by the way. 125 Best Tinder & Bumble Pick Up Lines That Are Funny, Cute and Totally Flirty Up your online dating game with these sweet one-liners. . A single slice, Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you. A NURSE is holding a baby, which cries. I think in effect, Mind? If you sit around and let them get on top, you [hands the car drill to Mikey, then walks to Matilda] I'll have her for that. MISS HONEY knocks three times and winces. 5. You oughtn't blame yourself now, come along. 4. Mrs. Wormwood: . What? MISS HONEY exits off the front of the stage. Lost your appetite? That was Miss Honey. My daddy says I should learn to shut my pie-hole. and I shan't be talking to you for the rest of the evening, you horrid little man! [appalled at Zinnia talking with FBI agents Bill and Bob] Come on, move you piece of junkyard fodder! Matilda's teacher? Can't you sell good cars, Dad? Sixteen times two is thirty-two. You're only four years old. MR WORMWOOD In the slip of a bolt, there's a tiny revolt. As me. No, Miss Trunchbull. MR WORMWOOD Specialness is de rigueur. Are you listening? LAVENDER The tiniest mite packs the mightiest sting. Because basically a sentence is just a big bunch of words. Smile for mother! google_ad_format="120x90_0ads_al_s"; Oh, of course. And honestly, I was really, definitely, sort of, almost thinking about owning up. DOCTOR So innocent I asked a thousand questions. And so it was, they decided to perform the most dangerous feat ever known to man! But Matilda can calculate complicated figures in her head in an instant! You're the spitting image. [Miss Trunchbull has accused Matilda of going into her house]. . MISS TRUNCHBULL and CHILDREN in a week. Your eyes are like the ocean; I could swim in them all day. "It is called," said the husband, announcing the event to the world's press, who had gathered to listen with bated breath [The voice of the ESCAPOLOGIST echoes her words.] . cancelled! Creep on back to that library of yours or something. How could she possibly have done it when she was sitting way over here? To unlock that power, all she had to do was practice. Shut up! Ahh! Matilda: Bunch of hippies and cesspool salesmen, ha ha ha ha Jenny: Why don't you run away? endobj The CHILDREN and BIG KIDS step back, leaving AMANDA in a spotlight. There's never been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle as . The fibers fused to my hair! Can you service me? MISS TRUNCHBULL grimaces as the purple spotlight leaves her. You can't. Agatha Trunchbull: Everything was arranged by [She pulls her coat over her head to simulate a hunchback, and grabs a large book.] They sits and unpack their bags. Yes, wonderful. CHILDREN and BIG KIDS run in, creating pandemonium. I'm not crying because it's sad. The apple never rots far from the tree! Matilda: NIGEL Did you see all those packages outside? [comes up to her and Matilda stands up] You missed it. If you were six-and-a-half, you'd be in school already. I have never been able to understand why small children are so disgusting. Agatha Trunchbull: If they start to squeeeeze out of your ears, you're going to need help. With her, it's all "books" and "stories". "There's more than one Whomping Willow at Hogwarts, you know.". Trunchbull: Back before my life had eNded, So you're Wormwood, are you? Ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely. Miracle! [Harry has ordered out of the house the FBI agents, whom Zinnia had just been talking to]. Do you have a job? Maybe you used some of mummy's peroxide by mistake. MISS TRUNCHBULL What was my profit for the day? Bruce! The hat shrunk! Are you being smart with me? You're just wasting energy, Oh, no, Matilda. What? MISS TRUNCHBULL I should be dancing the Tarentella Harry Wormwood: You listen here, my dear, You've seen one before. Don't hide it under a bushel. RUDOLPHO There's more the second part. Not yet, anyway. Michael: When I grow up . She didn't know. Tomorrow at one? Smells chocolatey, eh? Try to be funny, or clever, or both! MRS WORMWOOD walks back behind the curtain. Ah-ah-aah-ah MISS HONEY Semi-Spanish gown MR WORMWOOD These books gave Matilda a hopeful and comforting message: You are not alone." Roald Dahl, Matilda tags: books , literature , reading , words I invite you to reply with your own cheesy agent pickup lines, as long as they aren't crossing the line of harassment (actually scrapped a Reyna line for that reason). Six times two is twelve. So, erm . And even if you could, BIG KIDS So they say. It's just a door. But my mummy likes them! [He brings out a load of cash and starts leafing through it.] I thought grown-ups weren't afraid of anything. Loud, loud, loud, loud! [He sits down in a zen position.]. Tricks!" He should have thought of that before he made a pact with Satan and decided to steal my cake! [She holds her hand out to MATILDA, who takes it.] She rented it from this lovely rhubarb farmer for just $50 a month, and she covered it in honeysuckle, and she planted hundreds of wildflowers, and she moved out of her wicked aunt's house, and she finally got her freedom. FBI Agent Bob: Go on, Brucey! MATILDA ERIC, TOMMY, and BRUCE Eventually, they quieten down, but LAVENDER continues to jump up in down next to MATILDA, who is reading. [Matilda comes home from school, excitedly. Narrator: MISS TRUNCHBULL flails victoriously, then starts blowing her whistle. To hammer throwing, life, and school I have a nice house, a wonderful husband and you are slaving away teaching snot-nosed children their ABCs. MATILDA So go and put some highlights in your hair. Mr. Wormwood: Than the volume with which what you don't know's expressed. A curtain is wheeled in with the words "5 YEARS AGO" painted on it. How does that sound? [turns and sees Harry's hair] [He dances backwards and MRS WORMWOOD follows along.]. Mum says I'm a good case for population control. No one's gonna care if you don't care, . Harry Wormwood: . No! What do you want a book for? This miracle . Stop being pathetic, Jenny. Jane Eyre . I don't know anybody who did. This is the cottage from your story! | Share this Matilda : I love it here! They were left out there for the whole world to see because you weren't here to take 'em in! Who you been talking to? I'm incredible! Here's what I think of your lovely [He starts pulling at the book as though to tear it apart.]. You'd better hide! And Jenny's outside. Might as well be saying you think that it's okay, If you don't, I will get you. If you're being smart with me, young lady, you're going to be punished. My daddy says I'm his special little soldier. Oh, yeah? Fifteen times two is thirty. endobj They embrace and exit out the back of the stage. [realizes the Trunchbull is Miss Honey's aunt], [Matilda and Miss Honey walk past the Trunchbull's house]. Are you ready to get STICKY with MICKEY? That's not fair at all! But time is the one thing no one is master of. Like Romeo and Juliet, "tomato"? "I'm right and you're wrong, I'm big and you're small, and there's nothing you can do about it.". In all of Hooterville, where there's Hooters supreme, yours are the best of the Hooters I've seen. [Harry walks down to the kitchen, unaware that his hair has just turned an unhealthy platinum blonde] Agatha Trunchbull: MISS TRUNCHBULL in my opinion, this little girl should be placed in the top form with the eleven-year-olds! 'Twas written in the stars before they even met. MRS PHELPS RUDOLPHO And if I couldn't teach, I'd have nothing at all. AMANDA stands up and screams in triumph. "The books transported her into new worlds and introduced her to amazing people who lived exciting lives. And it was the most scrumptious cake in the entire world. Okay! MRS WORMWOOD Now sit up and look at the TV. Behind MR WORMWOOD and MATILDA, the scene changes from a living room to MATILDA's bedroom. Harry Wormwood: In business, son, a man's hair is his greatest asset. The woman from COUPLE 1 blows on a birthday cake as the table splits in two and MATILDA stands from behind it, holding a collection of books from one hand. [the Trunchbull's car, sold to her by Harry Wormwood, has broken down, forcing her to haul it all the way back to her house]. People whispered that in her dark and brooding heart, she resented the sister, both her success and her love. MR WORMWOOD You should read it. Four judges in outrageous costumes sit behind it. You and your father think you can make a fool out of me! I told them, I said, "Hey. As of now, that's 1 line for each agent currently in the game. But that's not fair! They're cops, Dad. Yeah, I got a boy, Mikey, and one mis-*take*, Matilda. MATILDA MATILDA Parents wheeling strollers enter alongside their CHILDREN. Trunchbull: Just so you all know, she's my best friend! . You? But I'm his little soldier. I always compete, doctor. In . Harry Wormwood: Use the rod, beat the child, that's my motto. Oh, you stupid man. I did *not* glue my hat to my head! Great, big, strong, scary woman she is. MATILDAThe moved into a beautiful old house at the edge of town, and in the evenings, they would walk and take the air. MATILDA's classmates enter hesitantly from the front of the stage. . Before I first heard the Pealing of the bell. So give me more cake! Two, three, four. You wouldn't beat them in a race! Life's a ball, so learn to throw it, Agatha Trunchbull: They are all dressed in costume: Eric as Batman, Tommy as the . Crime and Punishment . google_color_bg="EDC7C2"; MR WORMWOOD runs over and grabs MATILDA's book. <> The gate rolls away. MISS HONEY Zinnia Wormwood: We have everything . Matilda turns around and carrot is facing her. You'll fit it in. It seems that there are millions of these "one in a millions" these days. ], MISS HONEY Look! We're told we have to do what we're told, but surely, Mrs. F-F-I. I've often thought about it, but I can't abandon my children. Yes, Miss Trunchbull, please, you can! Jenny: That's the main thing. Now, get off to bed, you little bookworm. MISS HONEY steps away from MATILDA as MISS TRUNCHBULL enters by the blackboard. Only when they deserved it, of course. Oh What? . This living 'ell. Michael: She's probably having a meeting or something and won't want to be interrupted. The desks descend into the ground. MR WORMWOOD And now she's after me! Good show. And good luck with the Tolstoy. Hm? Lavender? Harry Wormwood: I don't know what you're talking about. MRS WORMWOOD YoU listen here, my dear, As I was saying, Matilda. . Don't sneer at educated people, Mr. Wormwood. Oh, my undercarriage doesn't feel quite normal. Let alone getting the conversation going! He takes it and squashes it firmly down onto his head. Whee! Miss Honey: It's just that they want that child so very much. MR WORMWOOD Quite the contrary. MATILDA Completely different cars, sir. MISS TRUNCHBULL Do all those brains in your head give you a headache? That is a promise. OLDER KIDS She says they make me look pretty! And instead of a musical fanfare, there was silence, as he solemnly strode into the room. DOCTOR Stop! Mrs. C, Mrs. U, Mrs. L-T-Y! And she keeps trying to tell me stories, Harry. We give the Whisper Challenge a shot with a little spin on it. Get out of it! Chew your food; you're an animal! [to Zinnia] Harry Wormwood: How far can you go? The most common thing in life is life . MRS WORMWOOD MRS WORMWOOD is behind the curtain. And I shall crush you. MATILDA collects her books. I don't want any, thank you. Ah-ah-aah-ah. I need a car, inexpensive but reliable. You don't let me talk to people! It's the mileage. Just you wait for phys-ed. Secrets. A large iron gate made of square holes of various sizes rolls in from both sides of the stage. The end is happier. Oh, hello, Miss Trunchbull. Zinnia Wormwood: Young lady, where were you? BIG KID [TAMIKA] 8. Jenny: They performed some of the most incredible feats together anyone has ever seen. No excuse, Bruce. I sold it for $1,158. It is flanked by AMANDA and ERIC in lab coats over their costumes. The school bell rings and all the children march out. [while putting baby Matilda in the sink to rinse away spinach] And I'm very sorry . Come on, Bruce, be our hero. Boys and girls! $5,000? SHUT UP AND LEAVE US ALONE! Have to admit . The Secret Garden . I'm the best! BRUCE wilts by the desk. There's never been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle Why? . Not a dot did I stray from the plot. Zinnia Wormwood: Take another picture of our angel from this angle over here. All right! MR WORMWOODLook what I've just found! "It is our destiny ". You have got to be Your hair! . Look at this. Matilda: You've not got the spine. I sold it for $7,839 big American boffo's. MISS TRUNCHBULL Think of the possibilities.". MISS HONEY . [Matilda uses her powers to slam her bedroom door in Harry's face just as he reaches it].